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Energy

Stamped: 6:15 p.m.


Painting
Originally uploaded by Michelaine.
I started painting again. It's nice. It calms me and lets out all my pent-up creative, emotional, artistic energy.

Yey for outlets.

I haven't felt down in a while, but this new year isn't doing nice things to my heart so far. I'm afraid of falling down. It feels like it's been so long since I've been really sad, now these mixed yucky feelings feel out of place and I don't have room for them in my life. I just wish I could be well all the time, forever.

Hearts are such delicate, foolish things. I sometimes feel like cutting mine out. And by that I mean I feel like cutting out the parts that hurt.

Another slightly worrisome and strange element to this new year is that I started listening to and really enjoying Skillet again. I haven't been able to listen to them for a long time because it's just too loud and hard core. But I really want/need/like it presently and that's probably a sign of not-happy-heart conditions.

sucky.

At least I have Skillet for those down days when I need to scream and call out to God to help. I have a very interesting affection for screamo music. Most people don't see that in me... but it's there.

Micha.

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  • Blogger CCCMMMM says so:
    1:34 p.m.  

    So yucky feelings are never fun, thats so true. I can almost find no tome to feel good these days. lol mostly because I have been sick for the last few weeks. But thats ok I'll get over it ok I think. I borrowed Emery from the library and it's different, I mean they sound good, and they have a great message to share, of what i've heard. They're good but I almost think they would be better if they didn't screem... which is funny but I have my own quote to say. "Mostly, I have to agree that scream has a beat and all the needs to be music, but the problem is that music was created for communication. When someone is screaming, it's incoherent, and the only possible message coming from his mouth is hate. Someone screaming at you is never a fun or good thing. The message may be perfectly appropriate, but the screaming just seems to show a lack of respect for the people he's talking to, or even against."
    Yup thats mostly what I think, so I would take them more seriously if they didn't screem at me. lol but they still are good. it's a funny line to draw. top

  • Blogger Michelle says so:
    4:19 p.m.  

    I think screaming can send a lot of messages other than hate. Like frustration, desperation, pain and even excitement. Sometimes those need to be expressed as well as more buoyant emotions. :) top